The Sack of Rome by the Celts

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Board: Etruria
Topic: Etruscan Madness 
Topic Editor: Tuscus Sempronius
Topic Description: For all those postings from the right side of the ...

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Message: The Sack of Rome by the Celts
Author: - Camitlnas Tullius, Patron 
Date: Nov 29, 2000 18:01
      This episode in history as told by Livy, must surely go down as the one 
      most in need of a Monty Python type script. The envoy must belong in the 
      book of heroic failures. 

      Just imagine it: The Senonine Gauls invade Etruria and surround Clusium. 
      The Etruscans don't like these smelly disgusting people one bit and send 
      an envoy to Rome. - Listen mate - we didn't help those nasty autocratic 
      people from Veii and let you conquer them - how about some military 
      muscle. 

      The Romans don't send Legions, but send an envoy instead who arrives at 
      Curtun and tells the Celts that they are very naughty boys and what gave 
      them the right to ask for gold and territory anyway? The Celtic leader 
      points at the tip of their swords - This does laddie ! 

      The Romans watch the Celts in their noisy hooting and yelling and 
      preparation for battle, then one of them says - hey - watch this! and 
      shoots their leader. 

      Suddenly there is a deafening silence and one of the Celts speaks up - You 
      killed Brennus ! - Never mind these Etruscans -  Lets get 'em! (Romans run 
      away stage right) 

      Envoy gets back to Rome and reports to his commander. Well Quintus did you 
      defuse the situation with your usual diplomatic tact? 

      Errr .... well we have a little problem. We have some extra guests for 
      dinner and they are a bit antisocial and don't play cricket. 

      ...And there's another thing-  they want our (under the breath ) gold and 
      err our women...... 










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